I just finished another 11 weeks of college. My anxiety was through the roof worrying how algebra would turn out. It was my second time taking it, and the Dean said if I failed again I would get an educational suspension.
Things seemed to make more sense this time around since I was on the medication. I was passing more tests, and I ended up completing more tasks than before. Even my focus was a lot better. As much as I hate to admit it, The medicine does help. Got a B this time to show for it.
Pooh asked to see the crickets at Petco. He seemed fascinated with them since his class took a field trip there. Even managed to ask to put them in a jar and take them home. I stop what I’m doing and give him what he asks because that is huge to me when he asks for anything.
We got to Petco, and it so happened his Teacher Assistant was working. Pooh was very confused at first seeing her there working, but we worked through it. She went out of her way to show Pooh some of the animals. They talked pet some animals eventually the flapping started. So I knew he was feeling better about things.
We had trauma therapy that night. I look forward to going more than I use to. The therapist has become a great supporter to me and pointed out all the good I do. I need that right now. Our time together we practiced emotions and expanding his knowledge of who he’s feeling. So instead of just knowing sad, happy, mad, Pooh will learn about anxious, confused, and worried. If that makes sense. I love how he looked over at my artwork and gave a good laugh. I felt very connected, and that made all the difference in the world.
Jenny seems to be doing well. She’s doing the boyfriend thing. It’s still a honeymoon stage, but it’s good to see her smile. She said she’s not in any pain after being sick. But She is due for an ultrasound Friday just to make sure her liver and spleen are okay. The doctor assured me her blood work looks good and not to worry but if they do find anything she’s will be referred to Hershey Medical Center.
If there is any good through this, my eyes have been wide open to realize I’ve had a narcissist for a husband. He feels he’s done no wrong and everything is my fault. (short version of it) Then after my break down, he’s ready to toss me to the curb.
But yet when he started rehab I was there for him, I guess, “For better or for worse” it only applied to him and not me.
My mindset has improved a lot; he doesn’t deserve me.
I want to give thanks to everyone who have reached out to me in comfort and telling me your stories. This is becoming an awesome form of therapy for me and I hope it has for you knowing your not alone. Autism Momma is growing!