*First and most important I want to thank The Women Shelter, agencies in my area, co-workers, and those anonymous people who have felt lead to help our family to have a nice Christmas. If it hadn’t been for everyone I don’t know what I would have done to give these kids some sort of normal after everything they’ve been through since May. I will always be greatful to all of you.*
Christmas didn’t feel different being alone but it triggered my PTSD. I felt like someone out side looking in, like it wasn’t real. Then the negativity ringing in my ear. I focused on my large window (I consider to be the present) and brought myself around and felt more in control of it.
Also I leaned on Pooh more. Not sure if that’s good or not but his pureness and good hearted soul helps me through it. His hugs are a healing. Makes me feel like I cant do anything wrong.
I received a fifty dollar gift card from my job for Hoss Restaurant, Jenny wasn’t interested so Pooh and I went. It was a rare treat for me since I never ate there before. Pooh always made things a fun adventure and showed great excitement once he found out there was a burger named Willy (that’s what they called him in elementary school Willy) so of course that’s what he ordered.
Over the break Pooh amazed me how more verbal he is. Just yesterday I told him I was going to take him out and asked where he wanted to go. He said, “grocery store” (that’s his normal answer) I then asked what would you like to get? (I wasn’t expecting anymore of a response) he gave me a clear answer. “Orange soda, hamburger, cheese and make cheeseburgers. OH MY GOODNESS!!!!! I stopped what I was doing and that’s where we went. Praising him all the way how well he spoke.
Buy the time we got to the store endlessly he was flapping and laughing, he knew he did good. Then the thought came over me. His doctor may have been on to something about when he regressed last year. He may have heard or saw something that was not nice to Jenny and didn’t know how to deal with it. It would make sense.
Before going to the grocery store I took him to the Goodwill (his favorite place it has his name in it) and we found a a stuffed dog. Pooh kept touching it like he was interested. So I asked him if he wanted it. Immediately he said yes. It was unusual because normally he not into stuff toys. But at ninety seven cents and a warn out nose, the way he was acting he had a love for it. I couldn’t say no so we bought the dog then went to the store.
One we were home I saw him studying the dog he asked me to fix the nose, so I got a marker and colored it in. He started to bounce and flap like he was happy with what I did. Again, I wasn’t expecting a response but I asked, “Whats his name going to be?” He said, “Larry”