I don’t talk to much about my daughter. Bipolar has been a difficult thing for me to understand. Along with mixing in her teenage years makes it that much more difficult to reach her.
I’m at a complicated place with her. She refuses to take her medicine. Has moments where she runs off for weeks at a time. Her anger towards me I don’t understand. I did everything she asked. And It wasn’t to spoil her it was because of the fact her brother has autism. He takes a lot of my time. So I always made it my point to make her needs known and do my best to make it happen.
My lack of understanding changed when she came to me Friday before Labor Day. “Mom I need to talk” Those words frighten me coming from her because she’s at her breaking point of whatever is troubling her.
Trying not to cry, she said, “Around five or six someone (I’m saying “someone” because I know I cant give names) was to touchy with me, I’m sorry.” I tried to get more information from her, but she couldn’t do it so I didn’t push it. Doing my best to stay calm, I let her know I was sorry she went through it and apologized that I thought she was just being an ungrateful kid.
Her boyfriend came at that point, so we stopped talking about it, as he was making small talk with me and I couldn’t help but to look at Jenny and see this lost look in her eyes, it all made sense now. The next thing is to help her.
When they headed out for their date, she turned to me and said, “I love you.” Its been a long time since I heard that from her.
Before I could answer back she quickly shut the door. Almost like she wasn’t expecting an answer. I stood there staring at the door and still said, “I love you too.”